I feel it is inappropriate for me to start a ‘Love’ category blog without first at the least trying to fix what I have broken in the past..
I will send this individually to you.
First of all, thank you for simply being who you are. You guys are blessed with pure hearts and caring personalities I wish I appreciated more.
I am writing to apologise for everything I have done before. I was stupid, I was selfish and I was blind. You all cared for me and loved me more than you had to.
For all the times I pushed you away and for all the times I isolated myself. Worst of all, for all the times I stood on the way for you to have fun. I am deeply sorry. We shared a lot of happy memories together which I will forever treasure and be proud of.
Sorry for not listening to you and for ignoring all your concerns. I have no explanations, no excuse and had no reasons to treat you that way. Sorry for being the sensitive person that I was, for always finding reasons to be upset and to channel my past frustrations to our friendship. Sorry for doubting you all.
I miss how close we were and how we used to do crazy things and laugh all night. I miss the times we spend together without doing anything but just being happy to be there with each other.
What hurts me most is that I did all these things for nothing because I failed my previous relationships, purely because I am not ready to be in one.
I hope it’s not too late and I pray that wounds may heal in time. We may not be back to how we were before but I want you all to know that I never stopped thinking about you. I will forever cherish our memories together and do know that I am just a call away.
I am in the process of regaining my life and building a better relationship with God. I hope that you also pray for me as I go through this process.